Obsession (free verse)

I am seized with ailing thoughts

as my synapses loop masochistic hindsight.

I drift in hazy dreams of If-Then……

Oh! Tether present day

to hopeful tomorrow

or I shall drift

into meaningless past

undone by its incomplete script

or tomorrow shall see today’s loss!

These layers on layers

of half written plays gather dust

and I cannot brush away the scattered pages.

Fragmented sentences and words unsaid

give weight to thoughts forever unanswered.

I glide through present day

untouched by feeling for fear

of feeling the pain of a life shattered

as it slowly circles the drain.

I must release this unchangeable past

or go mad from wasted hope.

Part of my obsession is an uncontrolled looping journey into the past.  If I am to overcome it I must break its’ hold over me.

Picture: psychology today