I am seized with ailing thoughts
as my synapses loop masochistic hindsight.
I drift in hazy dreams of If-Then……
These fragmented sentences and words unsaid
give weight to thoughts forever unanswered.
These layers-on-layers of half-written plays gather dust
and I cannot brush away the scattered pages.
I glide through present day untouched by feeling,
for fear of feeling the pain of a life shattered
as it slowly circles the drain.
Oh! Tether present day to hopeful tomorrow!
Or I shall drift into meaningless past,
undone by its incomplete script
and tomorrow shall see today’s loss.
I must release this unchangeable past
or go mad from wasted hope.
♦♦♦
For introtopoetry, Day Nine: Apostrophe. An apostrophe is an exclamatory figure of speech, sometime started with “O”, often directed to a third party. Im not sure if this “hits the mark” but it suited my plea.
I wrote this some time ago, in a state of passionate exasperation, in less then five minutes one day when I was just fed up with ruminating over what was and creating dreams of what could have been. My struggles with obsessive thoughts have, thankfully, softened with time.
Picture: psychology today